via Perez Hilton

I got on the phone with E! Online’s very own Answer Bitch (a.k.a Leslie Gornstein) the other day to discuss reality TV salaries and what, if anything, is cause for a pay bump – like bringing the drama and getting arrested and such. Sadly, there isn’t an equation where a girl-on-girl kiss = an extra $10K a season, or a night in jail = a book deal!

But can you just imagine what people would do if there was!?

Read the column here and tell me if you agree as to whether or not Deena Cortese from the Jersey Shore should be commanding a higher pay raise in light of her recent ratings inducing antics.

This just in: ‘Teen Mom’ star Amber Portwood was sentenced to prison Tuesday after getting in a whole heap of legal trouble, including felony drug charges, dropping out of rehab, and lying about a failed urine test.

Portwood was first arrested on felony domestic violence charges in November 2010 because of incidents seen on her show — where she was shown shoving, punching, slapping and choking her boyfriend, Gary Shirley.

Wow. Just wow.

While it was probably a very good thing that MTV captured footage this girl going nuts on her boyfriend so it could be used against her in a court of law at a later time, why didn’t the crew step in and help??

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Ever wonder how JWoww wooed her way onto reality TV? Maybe this will shed some light. I got hold of one of JWoww’s reality show applications.

True to form, she filled out the app like she acts on the show: BANANAS!

I particularly liked the answer to the question DO YOU HAVE ANY CELEBRITY CRUSHES?

JWoww’s answer:  FUCK THEM ALL.

Read on for more pithy gems from inside the remarkably legible mind of “business owner” and “Yoga enthusiast,” JWoww.  She runs shit!

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Jersey Shore is the reason people hate America.  After last night’s episode I wanted to join a nunnery and wash MY mouth out with soap.

I seriously hate watching this show.  It really makes me dumb and irrationally angry.  Kinda like JWoww.

Here’s a recap so you don’t have to suffer through it:

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MTV‘s smartest move in unscripted reality programming as of late has been jerking tears out of me for weeks.

The Buried Life, a show about four hot Canadians checking stuff off their bucket list, is stellar.  It has heart, humor and funny accents.  If Mayberry had a gang problem, it would be these guys – they’re polite, charming and you know they can fish.

It’s truly a breath of fresh air for me, who gets hives flipping back and for the between American Idol and yet another Teen Mom fighting with her baby daddy.

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